Home | Forums

Episode 0102: Seriously, I missed on purpose.

First | Previous Episode Index Next | Latest

<< | THIEF | >>
<< | Great Lakes | >>
<< | Jose Muerto | >>

Hail friends!

Today's adventure begins in the ever popular world of Trammel.

A world I have come to learn is worse than a prison!

Yes I said WORSE!


A prison where my hands, my means to live, are bound by mighty imperceptible chains.

Chains the gods have so kindly imposed to all beings within the world of trammel.

They are so kind aren't they?

While holding back the urge to vomit from the stench of this herd of cattle, I notice one of the bulls is selling just the Item I pilfered not too long ago.

I leave this world as quickly as I entered it.

What the hell was I doing at the bank anyway?

There's stealing to be done!


I remove my Bandanna for a moment and adorn my thinking cap.

*begins to think*

Where would I go if I were a couple of marks?


Minoc Gate of course!

*Puts bandanna back on*

I find two guild mates engaged in a fierce battle. A duel that would decide the fate of the world.

A duel to end all duels everywhere!

Slash Jr begins with a bombardment of fireballs.

Wild Cherry counters with...

Summon Creature?

His strategy fails him and he is left burnt to a crisp within an inch of his life.

The two stand there Staring at each other. Slash Jr began to realize what he had done as he looked at the charred body of his guildmate.

He cries out, "Oh, my god! Thank god you're still alive!"

"It doesn't matter anymore! If you want to date guys and dress up in panties and what ever the hell else you disgusting elves do then I don't care!"

"You're my friend and I lo-"

Wild cherry exits this realm.

His lifeless blue body slumps to the floor.

With nothing insured!!

Slash Jr cries out,

"Noooo!! My homosexual male friend and secret role model! I was just pretending to not be gay! I like wearing panties and secretly I want to become an Elf!"

"I just couldn't tell you!"

Standing beside the corpse of his would be lover, I prepare a poisonous dagger thrust to occupy slash.

I lunge at slash and miss.

He runs for the guard zone and I begin to loot.

I claim a not so 100% lrc suit and everything else on his corpse.

Later I run across the pair in Luna.


I wait, expecting him to offer me all his gold in his bank box.

It appears he has a speech impediment and Tourette's.

He then empties his bowels all over the luna bank floors.

I smile politely and pretend I didn't see that happen.

Until next time!

-Jose Muerto

<< | Jose Muerto | >>
<< | Great Lakes | >>
<< | THIEF | >>

First | Previous Episode Index Next | Latest

Copyright © 2008 uothief.com All Rights Reserved