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Episode 247: A Thousand Fortunes in the Night

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Hail friends,

Public Posting by Kael:
Tomorrow looks to have the first of two castles dropping in the swamps north of Trincic
61o 26'S 37o 7'E
Looks like Diablo has placed a small home in front of there ; )

Quite a few small homes have now popped up around these castle idocs hehe
I think there shall be some good fights tomorrow
Public Posting by Kage:
Yes and anyone with tracking and detect pleas show. I would like to keep MD from getting these spots... So everyone bring detectors because they will be on stealthers...

Today comes and goes and tomorrow was here before I knew it. I decide to put this new fangled Crystal Portal to the test and... I'm off!

I go out in search of today's entertainment. From the sounds of the local chatter and chest thumping, this was going to be primarily a scrub and SP! affair (with me in the middle).

(And on second thought, I probably should've taken Britain's moongate.)

It was still dark outside and I wasn't the first one on the scene.

I count not one, two, or three, but four pre-emtive loot houses that have spontaneously been constructed within the last few hours.

Diablo, the hormonally challenged young one, waits in his new house and Astynax of SP! trips over me while I check out the area. My cover isn't blown (yet) and that's good because there were a few more things that needed doing.

A few doors down I spot the second of today's many events.

The stage was set and the players were arriving.

I head north.

(This would do nicely.)

On this pointy northern peninsula, not a soul would suspect a thing. Close enough to the action for a quick drop off, far enough from the action to hide from anyone not looking for it, and most importantly -- right there in the open with no cover in sight. There were no houses, no trees, and no brush; the standard cover that everyone else would be using.

From the sounds of the increasing chatter on the public boards, this was going to be one hell of a party. I tried to get the word out to the others, but looks like I'd be doing this solo tonight. With the scrubs on one side, SP! on the other, random stealthers mixed in for flavor, and me solo and on the side, there was little chance for me to get the lion's share of the loot this day. Admittedly on the short end of the stick, I still had a few tricks up my sleeve. (This wasn't my first barbeque.) I travel lightly, leave my blessed kryss, blessed invisbility sash, blessed ferret form talisman -- I leave my blessed everything -- at home. I'd have to leave them home for what I had in mind.

*rolls up sleeves*

I mark my rune and wait for the festivities to commence.

I didn't have to wait long.

The walls come crashing down and out pops everyone from their holes. The poison fields and earthquakes were cast and everyone scrambled. Being the only one on the back end of the former castle, I grab whatever can fit into my pockets and begin shuttling it off to my northern retreat.

With superior numbers, the scrubs attempt to hold their ground. I make my third approach from the side. I eyeball a container with content number and weight to my specifications and...


A new castle is errected and Anck-Su-Namun of OSAR takes round one for herself. The scrubs, the loot, and myself are vomitted all at once, under the house sign.

(Round 1: Anck-Su-Namun)

I circle around one of the loot houses and approach again the from right.

It looked safe enough from the right... right?

(Sara Dale tests the waters.)

(Err... maybe not.)

I decide to get the prime booty out while the others were still fighting amonst themselves. Chances are, the marjority of whatever was left has already been rummaged through. With the speed at everyone was moving the rest of was still worth looting, but the prime booty was full of untainted goods.

If anything else, this loot was my top priority.

(Now where was I?)

SP! is still going at it. The brawl moves left and I move north.

Tripping over an invisible looter, my cover is broken for all to see. But it doesn't matter. I go in, get revealed, take what I came for, get hit with an earthquake in the process, and then... south we go.

Question: What's better than one secret stash?

Answer: Two secret stashes, of course!

On the southern peninsula, I drop off the goods and head back in.

The party was just getting started as more and more begin gating onto the field.

...but my eyes were on the loot.

From the swamp then to the north, back to the swamp then to the south, and back again -- the pillage continues uninterrupted and both of my stashes continue to grow.

The scrubs soon depart for locations unknown and the other put their guards down.

Don't you know that tile isn't safe to stand on?

(Here, allow me to assist.)

I snoop the others while they stand on what they think is safe ground and pick up whatever they drop off for one another.

And just when the quiet swamp was returning to its quiet nature... the scrubs return.

The second castle comes crashing down and the second round begins.

With even numbers this time, the scrubs wouldn't have a chance of holding their position.

(With even numbers they never do.)

I withstand another earthquake thrown in the general direction of my balls, wince at the pain, and cross my fingers, hoping I can still have children one day. I wait for SP! to draw them away and take what's mine.

The night's getting long and the locals are getting desperate. They're expanding the territory in which they fight and expanding the territory in which they loot. (All of a sudden my stashes are longer as secure as they once were.)

I cross my fingers, hope for the best, and drop my fun box amongst the rest of my southern stash.

With my southern stash secure, I head towards the north.

I return for the umpteenth time and -- WHAT'S THIS!?

An armor-less Anck-Su-Namun riffling through my things.

(Looks like I chose the wrong stash to booby trap!)

*squints eyes*

(You dirty whore.)

Without my kryss I go for my shurikens, but as I do...

She's gone.

*squints eyes*

(Correction: You lucky, dirty whore.)

Dye Tubs!

*checks again*

(Normal dye tubs.)


Anck-Su-Namun goes down.

*happy face*

...and so does Soggy Donut.

*sad face*

(I snoop around but don't find anything good.)

With all the best loot already gone (and one of my stashes discovered), I shuttle the remaining stash back home and it was time to move things to Stage 3: Steal until you can steal no more.

(And besides, I have a rule when it comes to IDOCs. You can't go home until you die at least once.)

(Hopefully someone out there would be happy to oblige my request.)

Soggy Donut waits around for what seems like ages as his scrub buddies are no where to be found. It would be a shame for someone to kick him while he's down.


I help myself to his armor and smoke bombs.


A few pet balls, but not much else to my liking.

Enter ScrubSlayer.

My new best friend and the star of today's adventure whether he liked it or not.

Phantroneous Cat takes one for the team (for a team that wasn't there), and ScrubSlayer finally stands still long enough (and visible) for the first time all night. Being a hider/stealther, he's been blipping in and out of my view all night long and I've snooped just about everyone else.

ScrubSlayer moves in to loot... and so do I.

A Large Dragon Ship Deed!

Now, let's take a minute to soak in this moment of perpetual bliss. Let's take a break from the action of today's adventure and take the way back machine 2 years and 7 months into the past on the shard of Napa Valley on the shores of Terra Sanctum.

*waves hands around mysteriously*

There I was, so long ago (in Episode 037). I had successfully pilferred some scrolls, a champion skull, and a ship key for a large dragon boat. The spawning party spawned, the raiding party raided, and I launched my own covert-operation off the western tip of the alcove. I sailed in a northern direction, checking the armada of boats with my new boat key. The boats formed a blockade, blocking the harbor from any would-be invaders. (The blockade failed.) The first boat was a bust, the second boat was a failure, and the tillerman of the third boat asked me if I wanted to rename my new dragon boat! And then... it vanished before my eyes. I was left with one hand on my key and my other hand cupping my genitalia.

(I had to hide my shame.)

Flash forward to today.

I've been looking for one of these for years and today, here it was.

(It's been on my "hit list.")

I make the steal and this time I display my genitalia proudly, for all the world to see! And without my blessed anything, I put my blessing to use now.

(I love when a plan comes together.)

With my blessing put to good use, I don't have to bother stashing it in an unsecure location or taking the time to make a go home. I stick around a little longer. I snoop, get revealed, and take on a few more earthquakes. I had an entire tower full of goodies waiting for me, but it didn't matter. With my blessed ship deed I had already won the day.

(Round 2: Chad Sexington)

Beezle Wakayama wins the second sweep stakes.

(Round 3: Beezle Wakayama)

Beezle and Anck-Su-Namun were the big winners this day.

I finally go home with my own prizes and sift through the riches that await me.

Upon further inspection, the noteable loot included:
  • Large Dragon Ship Deed (Donated by ScrubSlayer)
  • Dozens of Daily Rares (Fruit Baskets, Broken Chairs, Hay, Stones)
  • Dozens of Old School Enhanced Juka Bows
  • A Fist Full of Old School Charged Jewelry and Clothing
  • Hundreds of BODs
  • Countless Pieces of IDOC Armor (That we'll be living with dying with daily.)
  • Hand Fulls of Jewelry
  • Random Oddities
  • Resources
  • House Add-ons
  • (Too Many) Holiday Gifts
  • A 2 Year and 7 Month Goal Finally Completed
I'm sure some of the others made out with more loot and... I may have ended up breaking my IDOC Rule of Death, but considering the odds I was up against, I call it a win.

--And then I dig a little deeper.

*cracks open Lysander's Notebook*

"A thousand fortunes in the night."


I have no idea who Khal Ankur or "The Keepers" are, but I cross my fingers and hope they're as wealthy and as easy to pickpocket as this ancient tome (and their silly names) suggest. I am equally confused as to why L. Gathenwale is forging Lysander's Notebook in his name... but due to equally silly names, I'm betting they're both are as easy to pickpocket as the ones they worship.

(It's common knowledge that the higher a person's name registers on the "Silly Name Index" is in direct proportion to how easy they are to steal from.)

(Look it up.)

And if the writings in the ancient tome were true... perhaps the events that have transpired this night were foretold long, long ago.

*waves hands around mysteriously*

(And if the writings in the ancient tome were fiction... L. Gathenwale and friends can keep their personal fantasies of mutual "kneeling and prostrating" to themselves next time. I have no interest in reading about "Thy Sanctum." That's disgusting.)

'Til next time!

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