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Episode 197: I met a so-called orc today.

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Hail friends,

Returning from a failed experiment out west (an experiment that shall not be named), I return empty handed to Umbra Bank...

...and I wouldn't be the only one.

Mo'gluk, the orc!

The orcs, a rare and strage specimen these days. These days, sightings of them are very rare. Their entire race is all but extinct.

(All the more reason to take advantage of the situation.)

Now Mo'gluk was a strange one. I've seen him before and snooped him before. He's not your typical orc. He's a little more blue than orcs of the past. His guild includes a little more humans. His pack is a little more cluttered. His robe is a little too neon. And as I would soon find out... his english was a little too hummie! As a matter of fact, some may say (and have said) that he's not an orc at all!

(Some *crazy* people may even say that he's a role-player that doesn't role play!)

But don't tell him I said that. He'll go into an orcish rage if you do... Although his orcish rage is less orc-like than I had hoped.

A backpack full of Books of Truth and a pair of 115 Anatomy scrolls!

(It looks like his experiment was a little more successful than mine.)

As soon as I step up, he steps out. As soon as I step out, he calls a gate and steps away. As soon as attempt the steal he steps down and is just out of reach!


I missed something that was gifted right in front of me! I missed a prime opportunity! I not only failed in my experiments of the past but also in my experiments of the present! He enters the gate with my fingers all but empty and his 115 Anatomy scrolls (along with his not-so-orcish self) are gone from my life forever.



I vaguely remember something from the not too distant past.

*runs off to the public message boards and finds what he was looking for*

Public Posting by Mo'gluk
"Selling Yew Tower:

let me know what your offering.
will let it run until sunday night (if someone will hold a particular house for a bit)
if the bidding is high enough I willl leave it with orc stains to boot....


Tower is sold to Amanda Shade for over 15 Mil"

*checks sharp looking pocket watch*



All the cool people carry sharp looking pocket watches.

(Or so I've been told.)

::shifty eyes::


Mo'gluk in his slightly worn, public tower. I don't bother checking the doors.

(I've checked them before.)

I wait.

The ghost of Amanda Shade of the Wood Elves comes running up from the gate.

They come outside (standing 2 tiles away from the house sign), I snoop them both, and I pick up right where I left off.

No scrolls. No books.


Mo'gluk forgets something inside (?).

Amanda and I are mutually confused.

The tower was transferred but I wasn't done with them yet.

I stay.

(And it's a good thing I did.)

Mo'gluk: Can I have the quarter staff?

(Staff you say?)


(What's this? No mods, but a funny dark hue. *shrugs* I'll take it. What's next?)

"Done." the elf says as she's comforted in the fact that the staff was safely picked up by the orc.
"Done." the orc listens as he's comforted in the fact that the staff was safely picked up by the elf.

They continue.


(Box you say?)


Mo'gluk: And the bow too.

A neon bow? Frostbringer??


(Nay, not a Frostbringer.)

*sad face*

"Alright then." the elf says and calls a conclusion to their transaction knowing that the orc got what he wanted.
"Alright then." the orc listens as the elf calls a conclusion to their transaction, wondering where his staff, box, and bow are!

(His not-so-orcish rage builds.)

(Watch out.)

Mo'gluk: Where is the box
Mo'gluk: ?
Amanda Shade: I did not get it.

(Awww... the game is up! I was looking forward to entering the tower with them. ^^)

Amanda Shade: Seriously.
Mo'gluk: lol

Mo'gluk: Some thief is here then.
Amanda Shade: Snoop me if you like.

(Snoop Amanda? Why would I do that?? I already did!)

(She must be confused.)

"Just means I'll have to kill him more times." the confused orc implies that he's killed me in the past.
"If you want to be KOS forever, no biggie to me." the confused elf insists on sprinkling me with compliments.

With no more to be had here, I leave the confused people to fondle each other (or whatever so-called elves and so-called orcs do when they're not attacking each other on sight) and I return to the bank intent on cracking open my new chest of goodies. And even with my new stash, it still didn't erase my failure with the Anatomy scroll. I spot a pink dress on the ground and decide it'll be my punishment for a day, for my failure.

*pops open chest*

Ah, very nice.

A little while later (still in my pink dress), I return to Umbra bank after a second failed experiment (an experiment that still shall not be named). And I find a treasure greater than any possession gifted to me by the orc:

A rare, no-longer-spawning, Invisbility Sash with 36 charges!

36 charges and 36 times it'll save my life with my pockets filled with glorious, glorious loot!

'Til next time!

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