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Episode 040: Fun with Poison (Part IV)

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Hail friends,


The night before, I sent him to an early grave in the same manner and yet here he is again! Driven insane by the horrors of this world, all he can do now is buy axes from the Minoc blacksmithy, shout the words "Kal Ort Por," present the librarian with his talisman and repeat it over and over and over again!

I act to release him from his plight.

I will be reborn anew. I wish I could say the same for him.

Wait a second... there may be others! Tonight it would be my job -- nay, my duty! -- to save (by murdering) these pitiful souls.

Fortunately for me, I wouldn't have a shortage of victims to murder (to save!).

*happy face*

"It's for your own good! Your eternal soul will thank me later!" I yell back at him. I'm half-way around the corner when I hear him... weeping?

::Bad Chad. Very bad Chad. Go back and apologize::

I let out an obnoxious sigh as I turn around an drag my feet. "Jeff..." I begin to say as I scratch my forehead and attempt to ignore the uncomfortable silence, "...you forgot something."

"Yes?" Jeff replies. *sob* *sob* *weep* *weep*

"You forgot... MY DAGGER IN YOUR FACE!"


"hahaha... I'm kidding. You forgot... YOUR FACE IN MY DAGGER!"

(Dun! Dun! Dun!)


With two people forever in debt to me, I wonder how many others' faces need... uh... finding. Before I leave from this scene I do what any other sane sosarian would do...

I slaughter the horses because they're cluttering up my boat... plus, I hate them.

While waiting for their corpses to rot away, I find a cross-dressing miner! (And some say I make this stuff up. ^^)

"Your dress is very pretty." I yell out before he can recall away, "...PRETTY ENOUGH TO DIE IN!"

(Dun! Dun! Dun!)

Alas, Fabio and his very pretty dress were not to be mine (for now).

I return to collect my momento on behalf of Jeff.

Much time has passed, I'm apparently not very good at what I do, because E-wok is at it again. Still at the same routine. Still begging and pleading for my help.

I try not to disappoint.

A third time I free him from this world, and this time I hope it sticks. Yet... there's only one way to find out.

The city of Britain is only three short words away.

...and I find the most pathetic scene I've ever seen in my life. A ghost asking for the town guards.

*sad face*

My work was not complete after all. My over confidence blinds my vision... My dagger was not sharp enough...? Not enough blood has been spilt...?


*scratch head*


(Only one way to find out.)

I'm out of breath. The poison on my dagger begins to dry. My shurikens are running low. Yet, no matter how many people I save, there's always going to be "the one that got away."




(Only one thing I can do.)

I pray the gods will aid him in the void.

I stand close by, to hold his hand when he makes the final voyage to the great unknown.

The great EARepWilson has spoken and spit in the face of my cause! His wrath is swift. His will un-just I say! UN-JUST!

(Was it something I said? ^^)


"I look forward to our next encounter..." I think to myself, "...LOOK FORWARD TO MURDERING YOU!"


(Damnit, Yellow Beard.)

(Now they'll never take me seriously.)

'Til next time!

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