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Episode 0336: An Anthropology Project (Part 3 of 3)




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In 1997, on the Pacific server of UO, my character's name was Dalim. I didn't like PvP, and I was tired of mining. I saw that the profession of thief usually involved newbie throwaway characters who would loiter around the bank and try to double-steal against people for comparatively small amounts of stuff. I decided I wanted to professionalize it.

* * *


The final thing was on my shard, they had a GM-run event in Moonglow, which was a kind of thief contest. You had to find the special key or something somewhere in town. I never found it, but I have a feeling it involved picking the lock on a box somewhere which is an useless skill by the way.

So it is announced, "Jasper Coins has won the competition!" all over town. His prize will be awarded at the Magincia bank. So everyone starts crowding towards the bank and there's maybe 80-90 characters on the screen and the game is lagging like crazy.

The prize is supposed to be an unstealable box that the owner can keep in his inventory. You can put things in them and have them not be stolen.

So, I manage to somehow edge myself right up next to the GM and Jasper Coins himself. I've got both their backpacks open and I'm watching for this damn magic box. With great pomp and ceremony, the GM bestows the box on Jasper Coins and it drops in his inventory.

And what do I do? I steal that shit. First try, and it's in my backpack. Of course, the guards immediately kill me because I didn't plan ahead to get a partner to grab it off my corpse. The GM had to take it back by force from one of the rabble and fix the bits on that item so it couldn't be stolen again.

Jasper Coins may have been the official winner of the contest, but I consider myself the spiritual winner and the top thief.


-Dalim

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