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Episode 0333: A Mythical Beast Sighted!




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Sosaria is an odd place. It’s not unusual to encounter Magic, Unicorns, Dragons and other elements of myth and legends from a time long ago. However, it does have its own myths and legends. It seems as time passes, certain creatures are disappearing and sited less frequently as ages pass.

Today I sighted a mythical creature that many people claimed was extinct! Oddly enough, the beast didn’t seem to think he was all that unusual. I ask my citizens to judge for themselves whether I exaggerate the rarity of this elusive mythical beast.

The beast is the much maligned “Red Hooded EE-AY Wurker” The Red Hooded EE-AY Wurker is said to be a messenger of sorts that may grant favors to citizens. It allegedly repeats itself a lot and often provides non-responsive statements to answer the angry demands and inane pleas made of the gods.

I was minding my business (other people’s property), when I spotted the creature in the most unexpected place.
The middle of Luna, the most popular shopping mall in the realm.

Shocked at this sighting, I was determined to find out why it was here and what message it had for my citizens.

I expected that he had grave or momentous news about my fate or the future of my bank balance.

Unfortunately, the Red Hood’s answer was a little less momentous than the mere fact of finding him.

Hi? You just want to say Hi? You’re the first Red Hood anyone has seen in an age and your great message is freaking Hi?!?!?!

Crushed, I knew I had to ask the obvious question of this bizarre specimen of a Red Hood.

He seemed as confused by my response to his mundane message as I was by his mere appearance.

And his response was about as unexpected as the time I found millions of gold sitting on the ground, ripe for the taking.

This unusual occurrence followed by the almost absurd responses warranted further investigation.

But frankly, even a King can be stunned sometimes…

The only question I was able to come up with was hardly up to par with my world renowned wit.

As you know, Red Hoods are not famous for giving satisfying answers.

And this Red Hood was no different…

But I am the King. And my lack of witty responses could always be made up for by my statements of the obvious of championing of the common peasant’s causes!

But I am a kind and gentle King so I decided to welcome this extremely rare creature to my Kingdom.

In response, the damnable rare ingrate decided to leave…

Ungratedful jerk….

::Dazed and Confused::

I was convinced that I might have been hallucinating and that this encounter was just a bizarre fantasy. I mean seriously; How often does one chance upon an encounter with a mythical creature while in a crowded shopping mall where nobody else seems to react to the beast?

But I snapped out of it when a citizen riding a big pink dog, wear a metallic pink and blue dress asked me what the Red Hood was doing.




-Evil Lord SMuRFY,
The King of Thieves and Encounters with mythical creatures.


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