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Buenas Dias Amigos,
After a long walk across the deserted feluccan continent; I once again find my self at the Yew Gate. Irritated at the fact I could not locate any marks other than the battle hardened thugs that patrol the woods of Yew, I annouce my arrival to everyone in ear shot.
"Hear ye, hear ye" "The Thief Jose Muerto is here to inspect thine pockets!"
"Hide thy valuables and guard thy purse!" I yell.
"Equip thy chastity bel..." I say as i am rudely interrupted by the dainty bard Larry Song as he breaks into song with his flute.
*Who is this transsexual elf who dare interrupt my grand entrance? I am in no mood for this.* I think to my self as i glare in his direction.
He catches my glare and takes it the wrong way. Next thing i know this tranny is grinding his backside onto my groin.
Now, any regular man would have probably instantly killed this he-she for violating them. But I am no regular man, I am a thief. I take this opportunity to take a closer look at his flute.A flute of Renewal! Oh what glorious days we live in!
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Realizing my lack of stimulation from his disgusting display he plays his flute louder and steps away from me. He then continues to grind his backside on a tree as he incessantly plays his flute.
Elves love their flutes and trees a little too much if you ask me.
I boldly walk toward him and snatch his flute from his effeminate hands."You will be playing this flute no longer sir" I say with a sneer.
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I mock him as i attempt to play his flute.
Overcome with hormones he begins to cry.
"Can i have it back please?" he says sobbing.
"How much would you like to pay?" I ask with the intention of turning down what ever offer he gave me."None" he replies with a seductive look and tone about him.
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"I do not accept sexual favors from transsexuals." I proclaim.
He then continues his blubbering as he wanders away without his precious flute.
I head to Luna to bank my prize.Already satisfied with my loot for my day, i slowly make my way back to Yew to see what else can be found.
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And am i glad i did!
Within the pack of mantish of XV I find a tactics 110 scroll! The demand for these is very high and i have almost sold out of my stock!I quickly take my item and notice that there is a stack of scrolls concealed within his pack.
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I make another pass and see another scroll to my liking, a 110 Necromancy!
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Again I reach into his pack undetected and steal my scroll.
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He then recalls away. And i find my self wondering what more scrolls could have been had.
*Where would i go if I was mantish of XV?*
To the XV castle in North Minoc of course!I couldn't have been more correct!
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Unable to shadow jump to his location I miss my opportunity to snoop his pack again. He decides to take refuge inside the castle walls and i begin my investigating.I move up to the walls and identify the inhabitants. An army of XV but the castle owner no where to be seen.
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Perhaps i will wait a moment longer...Malicore!! The Lord of this castle!! What great treasures does the mighty Malicore have for me?
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Unable to shadow jump i slowly creep toward him, risking detection as i pop his pack.Nothing!!
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...
*Notices Malicore is not wearing his chastity belt.*
...
*mantish proceeds to violate Malicore*
...
And that concludes another day in the life of Jose Muerto.
Hasta Luego!
-Jose Muerto
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