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Episode 135: Fumbling and bumbling my way to victory.

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Hail friends,

Not all steals are as graceful as a well executed belly flop. Some are spectacular train wrecks. And others are immaculate, illegal substance induced, hallucinatory trips that end up with me waking up on the floor in my own barf and/or unknown bodily fluids.

I aim for the belly flop, but sometimes I don't quite clear the rocks below...

(And somehow still manage to recieve thunderous applause from the on-lookers.)

::squints eyes::

I enter Depise for a late night snack with crust still in my eyes.

I wonder who it was going to be.

8 red candles, 1 white, and an unknown culprit around and about.


The last time I saw him he was flying the colors of W@R. He was the last person I was expecting, but he'll do.

Vorn shows up (another old face) and the colors become clear.

Ah, my old friends from ROFL.

I wait in the weeds expecting another exciting adventure in thumb twiddling, but Kalimore rudely interrupts me.

One hit. And again another. Poisoned. And now down for the count from lvl 3 spawn.

His body flashes blue to the side. I give his invisible ghost some time to run for aid (and away from the island). The cross traffic from other ROFL was low and my thumb twiddling interrupted. I decide to make the most of it and pop his corpse in hopes of a 10th anniversary artifact or two.


I slip back into the shadows and pick up where I left off. (I doubt I've been spotted.)

Trinity, Lord Price Vlad, and Baby Firefly all show up for the party just as Baracoon is about to pop.

I get into position to reap the rewards.

I fumble the job.

Due to my incompotence, I bumble the fumble and I find myself standing 1 tile too far from anyone. I stand idle as they slowly sift through their scrolls and hand them off to Kalimore. I stand idle as I let this one slip through my fingers.

I stand idle as Vorn takes a step to the north.

(What's this?)

Not a scroll and not what I wanted.

I stand and stare at it as Kalimore eats a scroll. Take a step and surely become revealed for a prize that may not be there? I give it a few more seconds for any one of them to give me a verbal clue to their scrolls.

*crosses fingers*

They all remain silent and slowly jump the gate.

Plan B it is!

I ignore the gold around me and give chase.

The Kalimore and Baby Firefly are gone. Lord Prince Vlad flashes my sight and is wisked away. Vorn trots to the gate and I make my move.

He make it to the gate, he ponders his destination, and I dash for his pockets.

A second later he would've been gone. I take the teleporter to the spider's lair, but I'm ready for them. The pantsless necromancer doesn't give chase.

Not bad for a few minutes of work.

'Tis a beautiful thing.


What's that...? A sound off in the distance you say...?

I tell them to stop applauding. I bumbled it again. But they just hoot and hollar louder.

(And I'm pretty sure I heard a faint, "Cry more!")


::squints eyes::



'Til next time!

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