Hail friends,
Back in the shadow of the bearded lady, in Britain, again I stand. Britain, where women walk like men, where men run like women, and where man-gina is a hot commodity! I wander the streets of Britain, keep my own man-gina safely tucked away from the muscular women, walk the walk, talk the talk, and find an elder tailor busy sewing away with a nice suit of armor and a very full beetle.
Bulk order deed after bulk order deed he accepts, completes, and turns in with a smile.
I take a closer look.When... the tailor hops on his beetle and... and...
...doesn't move a muscle.
...
Was the tailor sleeping or awake?
*ponders*
...
Only one way to find out. I take a shuriken from my belt and let it work it's magic.(Guess not.)
"lol." he/she says as he/she violates my man-gina.
Without fancy cloth, without fancy armor, molested and with no dignity I ask the local healer for aid.With no practical compass on me, I wander aimlessly through the streets. And at East Brit Bank, it seems I'll get a chance to right my failure with the tailor.
"BANK" she says as she announces her alterness.
(This one would require a little savy to pull off.)
*cracks knuckles*She fills her pack with thousands of regs as a few hundred spill out the sides. I help myself and it seems her alertness is not what it seems.
I reach in and take a talisman.Not a sound.
*grin*
I check her packs again and find another talisman, but this one even more powerful than the last!I help myself, ever so quietly.
She takes a few steps forward...
...and so do I.
Nothing left of much value, I start snatching wildly. First the ninja belt, then another talisman. I have my eyes set on her mysterious little black book when... I'm flagged as a criminal!
"It wasn't me!" I tell the thick mustache'd dominatrix. "I'll do anything."
...
"Anything." I plead as I begin to disrobe.I brace for guards, but all Jury has to say is "Kal Ort Por!"
*whew*
I reset my mind, reset my dignity, and call this one a win. I begin to inspect the corners of the bank when God of Life rudely interrupts my gluttonous, mental field of victory.
"A murderer?" I ask rhetorically outloud.
"A murderer on a mission." I correct myself silently.I follow him through the streets to the north, past the mage shop, past the bardic missionary, and towards... the smithy! Past the smithy he goes, I follow, I track, but soon lose my quarry. I double-back with a smile on my face for something else has caught my eye.
DankFire!
(It seems today is full of second chances.)
Back again with a new band of miscreants. There she stands, the one who got away, the symbol of my latest failure, and all the events of the day come to a crashing, screeching halt. There she is with her (still uninsured) talisman that I seek so badly.
I move in and this time... unabashed.
Mighty steed after mighty steed they tame. (They've done this before.)
But soon I find DankFire with 20 bandages, Alish losing it to a much greater foe, and Sardisen unable to resurrect with any bandages of his own in his inventory.
(Interesting.)DankFire hands 5 of her 20 to Sardisen. And he uses 1 to resurrect and a few more to heal their dead friend. Their mounted mage friend gives them moral support from the side-lines but soon makes his exit.
(Interesting.)I circle around to the north.
I grasp my kryss, keep my dagger at the ready, mount my ethereal steed, wait for that perfect moment.
The plan was simple:Wait for the tamer to wander outside of guard zone and take on all three underequip, bandage-less, foot soldiers by surprise. A shuriken to the red, an infectious strike to the grey, everything I had left to the blue, and finally collect my prize.
Wait for it...
...
Wait for it...
...NOW!
I throw my shuriken and attack at full speed. Everything moves at slow motion now. I plundge my kryss into my foe and deliver a dose of poison while my shuriken was still in mid-flight.I turn my attention to the tamer and... she runs east into guardzone! I can't turn back now! I am committed! I charge in guns blazing! First the poison, then a death strike. One more, one last swing I need!
VICTORY!
I collect what's mine as the verbal assault begins.
"Chad, we're big fans." they heckle and throw stones at my feet.I head back to the bank, place my new treasures next to the others, equip my shiney new curse removal talisman, and crown my man-gina this day in spite of my failures of the past.
::A few days later::
DankFire: Heya, whats it gonna take to get my talisman back lol'Til next time!
