UO Thief | Episode 046: A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words
Episode 046: A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words
Hail friends,
Yet this one is only worth five-hundred.
It was a dark and stormy night, alone in my bed with no end in sight. Why must I suffer? Why couldn't I sleep?
Questions, no answers. Alone in the deep.
“The scrolls!” I exclaimed, “The scrolls was the answer!”
I get dressed in a hurry. No underwear, only trousers. While I lay in my bed trying to sleep, others were wide awake
farming the treasure I seek. I head to Despise. Despise is where they’d be. Farming the scrolls, the same scrolls that
I seek. I grab my trusty dagger, with it I have nothing to fear. I drink my liquid courage, I down five more beers. I
make ready my shurikens, I make ready to fight.
“Kal Ort Por!” I shout out. I shout out to the night.
I arrive without warning. And I arrive not a moment too soon. Five or more Wu Tang Friends now face Baracoon! The bridge
to the island was covered in fields. I rush to the star room, the room without shields. Lady Serendipity was the first to
the gate. Maybe it was destiny? Perhaps it was fate? I pop open her pack and to my surprise; I pop open her pack and 120
Bushido – no lies! Four, now five others fill up the room. I focus, I target, I freeze – I can’t move! A monster of
ancient times reaches out and grabs hold! These monsters: not fables nor legends as I was told! The Lag Monster they
called it! The Lag Monster grabs hold! I struggle, I panic – I’m froze!
“Mercy?” I pray, but the only answer is “lol.”
My heart was discouraged, my ego was shot -- I return to the dungeon for it all be for naught! This time it be different!
This time victory be mine! I calm down my nerves -- ready to shine. This time a mounted murderer & Lady Omoto-Kyo were my
foes. Shunted but still standing, I prepare to exchange blows! First through the gate was the puppy riding red. Second
was his mate: a wraith, an undead. She was grey to the world, unable to escape, she casts invisibility as she hides at the
gate. My reflexes were sharp, no Lag Monster appears. 115 Lore, the moment of truth now draws near. She pops out of
hiding, convinced she's in the clear. As her friend jumps the gate a moment too soon. Alone with the stars and with me --
her only boon.
I grab what I can, I run to the left. I grab what I can, I am out of breath.
This is a tale; not noble nor bold. There was no Bushido. No mountain of gold. Yet, this is a reminder to me and to
others, a reminder of treasures that be mine -- if not tonight, then another.
I cry myself to sleep with my 115 Lore. I finally drift away. I’m ready to snore.
...four-hundred ninty-eight, four-hundred ninty-nine, five-hundred.
'Til next time!
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