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Episode 029: Old Habbits Die Hard

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Hail friends,

Through my boredom I find myself -- yet again -- at Brit Gate. I find a lone sentry left to guard the gate by himself. His shift would be over soon and other blues to bear the burdon of gate safety would come. Whatever I was going to do I had to be quick about it. I approach and he doesn't move a muscle.

I've forgotten how well equipped sentries are! Potions of all colors of the rainbow. Orange petals, purple petals, bolas, enchanted apples, trapped crates, and fishsteaks!

I test the waters by snatching an enchanted apple that has caught my eye.

Maybe it be the late hours of a long shift coming to an end, but I could swear this man was asleep. For shame! And you can yourself a sentry.

With no other in my guild around, this job would be my own. Stealing all those items one at a time would take much too long. Not at the gate. Not here. Someone would eventually come to spoil my fun and it would all be for naught. If there only a way to bypass the town guards. Perhaps if I hide a bag behind a tree close-by. I could relieve him of his possessions one by one, store them safely in the bag and return until the job is done. Perhaps I could recruit a wide-eyed street urchin, to assist me?




I'll just kill him.


I hear him snoring inbetween the body spasms. I become nervous as the poison takes much longer than I anticipated. His resistance to poison was very high indeed.

The talking bunnies come out of hiding to enjoy the show.

He fights off the poison through his courageous slumber. A worthy adversary indeed! I re-introduce him to impeding death.

I loot his embarrasing corpse as fast as I can, but not fast enough.

The talking bunny warns me of danger.

I remind him that bunnies can't talk. He reminds me that I'm grey, I'm at his mercy, and I smell.

*attempts to find words to defend honor*


Fucking bunnies.

I didn't get all the potions, but I call it a win. The other sentries soon gather so I leave them to their own demise. And yet... something is bugging me. Something... from the past.


A rune from days long since past sill remains in my runebook. Too lazy to finish the job before, I would finish it now. I'll show you who smells.


"Your mom smells."

Yeah. Got'em. Stupid bunny.

Just as I left it so long ago.

The process was long as cumbersome. I knew he would not show. The house remains as it did when I last laid eyes on it. No one has set foot in this home for months. And in my victory... I am... dissapointed?

Has it all become too easy? Do I long for a real challenge once again?

My thoughts are troubling indeed.

Even as I stock my new vendor, I seek answers.

It's unanimous.

For so long the thought of the champion spawns bored me to tears. I may have to visit them once again to get back my mojo.

*smells own fart*

'Til next time!

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